What if god was senile?

Ram frowned upon sita as if to say - i am sorry but your agni pareeksha doesn't qualify as a sign of chastity. he raised his eyebrow and was about to say something when he realised he had forgotten . old age was such a bitch it spared no one. he had had particular trouble trying to remeber where he left his glasses after his morning game of sudoku. That wasn't half as troublig though to the general junta. After fighting for a good Fourteen years from his family and being kicked out the cut by tommy hilfiger in the first couple of rounds he wasn't really feeling at his brainiest best. he suddenly remembered he was supposed to make india win the third match in the windies but reacted a second later, yuvraj cursed as he looked at his stumps dislodged.
but all wasn't lost in this age of technology he just looked at his mobile and retrieved his speech for sita. He took a deep breath and said...."i am sorry but your agni pareeksha doesn't qualify as a sign of chastity".


PS:thanks for the inspiration sharmaji!!

When i die

Hypothetical conversation if i die and go to heaven.

my eyes open
me: i am fucked!!

pretending to recover from head injury that was the cause of my death.

Me: Mein Khan hoon?
St peter aka yamdoot etc etc....: TUM pearly gates pe ho vats
m: par mera naam vats nahi hai
SP: yeh mazaak karne ka waqt nahi hai. acha tumne zindagi mein kya kuch kiya
M: bahut kuch sir. meine logon ko help kiya kabhi apni biwi ko dhoka nahi diya i was a good boy Sp
SP:lekin beta tumne bhagwan ko kabhi kyun nahi maana
M: time hi nahi mila uncle
sp: sorry par aap bhagvan mein invest nahi karoge to kaise chalega?
M: chaliye ab pata chal gaya thank you...
and since god is just waiting to forgive you even at the last minute cheeky me will walk alongside him in the kingdom of heaven...

I recently went through an interesting experience.i think i came to question one of my fundamental beliefs and well this also resulted in me thinking of interconnected issues which i find hard to express with clarity. So running the risk of the before mentioned, here it is.
For the Sake of brievity i think what i am writing about is trust and information also in a sense what anonymity means to us. i was watching this program the other day (scrubs) , where this doctor asks his collegue why people lie? And to say the truth i really couldn't see a good reason why, at least in the context of medicine. I mean after all doesn't honestly with one's medical examiner give you the best possible chance at good medical service? but i can remember countless times i have lied to a doctor misquoting my symptoms, sometimes to avoid medication and other times to just not be looked at as a sick person. Ok so maybe sometimes to live up to some macho image that my friends would say i am delusional about[;-)].But seriously this irony was well interestingly stark.
Then i came upon another interesting issue that of annonymity,which branched from the earlier. i Have been giving some serious thought to the fact that the internet is a democratic and well if not perfectly so a free space. Speaking to a friend led m e to believe that i must moderate my comments for he believed (and convinced me too) that i would be doing it for my own good. i of course have decided to not do so.(which by no means is proclaiming my total love for human thought and expression and how i am the last standng samaritan who permits people to say stuff they want). Interestingly this throws open another thought which i find quiet perplexing. When the internet is the most democratic and free space that can be thought of at the moment. why are people most afraid to be them selves there? or is it that, the lives they lead are but the mask that is shed?
I speak of the numerous times i have seen myself type erase and retype on messenger the times i have deleted stuff.
well the Point i am trying to make is this . the question is not if i am a person who was ever in a band or watched a film or had a friend called deepak.
The larger question is, isn't it ironic? that when we(or at least i did) dream of a place where just being ourselves is possible it was never a corollary that we would still not be able to get over lying from ourselves....
Random thoughts i admit but well thats what you get when you put a monkey in front of a typewriter and he outsourses the work to me!!

I just finished with playing for my band boo hoo. and all i can think of is my friend's band played its first concert in baltimore on friday.... why???? ok i am happy for him but i wanna play..i hate this episode of my life some times i wish we could jump chapters and replay it like i do when watching films on power DVD? should it be an option hmmm...? i dunno..
Btw for those who saw it took the picture off cos i thought it was cheesy.