For Neha... Yet Again Strangely because of Cousin Meera

An old picture Neha Sharma and Me before the Great battle of Dhaula kuan 2003

One of my closest friends got married a couple of weeks back. It was a good battle and the groom fell with honor. Many bards promised to sing of his bravery for many year to come as my friend ( Neha Sharma who miraculously became Neha Verma after she gorged on his heart , soul and surname) finally left the marriage with a smile on her face, which could only be described as gluttonously content. While Deep (A person i don't know personally but admire for having married Neha) watched on as if his his life had just ended. He of course had this entire situation mixed up as, his life had ended the day he had met Neha.

Back in the day when Neha's mother fed, clothed and generally kept me and my room-mate chauhan alive we were regular visitors to her place. On one such occasion, the occasion of interest here, we decided to play a game of chess. Now it should be noted here and i explicitly state here, If you know something , and i mean really know something and you use it against someone who is just trying to impress a girl, man give the guy a break, don't be mean dude. You are probably wondering what i am talking about and the point will get clearer.
So we are sitting in the living room and the game starts incidentally her dad is reading the paper on the table. Fifteen minutes into the game and she has practically lost every piece except a horse and her king. I have a slight smirk and am trying very hard to make my skinny Southie torso look like I am Adonis. All this while on the fringes of my little victory lurking was her dad who looks at the board and slowly nodded his head and started playing for her.

There are wars then battles, skirmishes, duels and then there was what happened that evening. The guy, with one horse beat the living crap out of me in front of his daughter. It was surgical and clean. Though i hold no grudge against the guy now (Nakul and Shashank(my other friends) avenged me by replacing his helmet with a smaller sized one That poor gentleman has ridden many rides with a tight helmet because of our misdeed) but Dude! i mean you just don't do that. You don't Australia(verb) Bangladesh just cos Bangladesh came over and started winning against Australia B , do you?

Anyhow the moral of the story is this. If you have a chance of going into a chess game and loosing. Avoid it by playing a simpler game like ludo.


P.S No bard has agreed to sing anything involving me apparently it is against there law to sing about bespectacled skinny mallus. Hey, its a sub clause in the who not to sing for in the Bard Code and they take there subclauses seriously.

I stink therefore i am

Am back from Washington where i had the good fortune of getting together finally with Adil, a friend of mine with whom I had written the mojorama blog. It was strange i guess cos Adil was three years my senior in college. I have effectively met him three times in college and yet our chemistry on a online theater group we both are a part of was immediate.
Meeting him was like meeting an old friend strangely enough. It was as far as i am concerned a long four days of discussing many intense ideas some memorable and most forgotten in a haze of several intoxicants.
One of which stuck to me rather strangely. He told me ,and i agree with him when he says this, that the notion prevalent largely in America, disregarding the coastal cities, is that men and women can never be friends. What was strange about this notion was he told me that the idea centered around the fact that it was impossible to negotiate the sexual tension that arises between two people of the opposite sexes. Coming from India where at least at the University level this seems like a preposterous notion i was quite surprised. Mainland America sadly enough is not like the soap opera/ sitcom setting we get to see on cable television. It is a conservative society with women as weirdly stereotyped as men. Kids come in to college with the sole idea of finding prospective partners and it is strange that this would be the same university setting with the highest incidences of STD's and such. But returning to the topic at hand can a guy and a girl ever be friends? So much so that he said you could be friends with a guy but not his say, wife or girlfriend.
So the question of interest here is where does it arise from? is it that men in general can't stay inside their pants or is it driven by the insecurity of the male in the relationship.
I haven't toyed with the idea of the woman's role in this cos quite honestly, i couldn't think of what it would be. But any ladies out there are feel free to let me know.

I got tagged into doing this by meera

Five Things I’d Love To Do Before I Die
(In no particular order)
1) Write a book
2) Play in a fusion band
3) Act in full length play
4) play bass
5) Truely understand music

Five Things I Will Not Do Even If It Kills Me
1) Work hard
2) Listen to people
3) Wear pink
4) Wear pink twice
5) Buy Pink clothes for myself

Five Things I Do When I’m Away From The Public
1) Pretend im being interviewed
2) Sing the entire part of a song drums guitars vocals all in one go.
3) feel like i am away from public
4) read
5) do no more than five things

Five Fave Sentences/Quotes

1]are we delhi-ites or delights?-anuj bawa
2]dude meri fuck chud gayi- kapil madan
3]hello i am hot rich and dumb and i want to be with you though you are ugly and strange and this makes you feel good about yourself- Imaginary lady conviniently concocted right now.
4]Yo brother yo- rajeev pandalai/rajesh pandalai /Santhosh ramaprasad/ Dramaprasad
5]Dai!- Vikram Sekar



Five Things I’ll Make You Wish You Didnt Do, If You Did

Tell me to say five things


Five People To Tag
I don't know if five people read this blog

Quick question

Ok so here is the deal. i was wondering if i wrote a book how many of you who read this blog would read it. I promise to edit it type set it and on the whole make it free for download. I figured i write about gods andwhat not always why not make thi stream of thought into a novel what say?

Renegotiation proof Equilibrium and God

This long drawn out silence i have maintained can be attributed to the fact that i was away, down& out and in the dumps and on cloud nine at the same time since i last blogged. You might imagine that that is a lot of places to be and many statuses to enjoy and my honest answer to that is well... yes it is.

The current return i can wholly attribute to my girlfriend who got me thinking about renegotiation proof equilibrium and god. See if renegotiation is costless they colluding firms would meet again and again to renegotiate an agreement and therefore they would always have incentive to cheat because it wouldn't be in the suffering firm's interest to punish the other at it's own cost. I believe the same applies for praying.
If you pray and "god" doesn't grant your wishes you will always go back to god to ask for more the next day. And regardless of how many times he 'cheats' on you it is in your interest to go back and ask for whatever it is you want this time around.
She thinks it seems fair enough since anyway one's relation with god according to her can usually be boiled down to one of "you watch my back /give me things i ask for". things sort of balance out for god by permitting him cheating.

btw my girlfriend hates economics.

Aiyyo Jyokea!!

What do you do when you need to get through a door, its locked, you don't have the key and the only one around is me?

Ram a prasad

Intense keratin related questions in my mind

1] can you get dandruff in your mustache ?
2] if you did would you use a shampoo?
3]what kind of shampoo? normal or dandruff shampoo?
4]why don't you shave?
5]Wouldn't i be a bitch if it would be there regardless?

Bored out of your wits?

i would imagine that god must be one bored guy/gal/god....??? But before you get excited bout god's gender or godliness, let me tell you this post is about th fact that he is all pervasive, all knowledgeable... and clearly bored. God can't be excited about anything right? i mean he/she knows what is going to happen from the beginning of time to its end. so whats the point? plus he/she knows that even if he/she changes anything he/she will still know what is going to change at all dimensions. i am assuming if god has a friend with whom he watches the world he must feel like a person watching a film for the second time.. either that or he must feel like Marvin the paranoid android.

Two Observations

1] How do you explain Chikki to someone who hasn’t heard of the concept? Do you just call it a groundnut sweet bar or granola bar? Some how I am thinking it isn’t the same thing.

2] There is something called ‘Beggar thy Neighbor Policy’ where a country exports its unemployment. I wonder how different it would be from that if I tried getting married to a hot woman who had a lot of money and just needed someone to take care of the kid and the ‘home’. Would that qualify as exporting my unemployment??

Joke i just made up

1]What would you call Sufi music if it was silly or ridiculous?

Ans] Goofy Music

The number twenty five (rantings of a senile fart)

Many apologies to the three people who read this blog.. i have been bogged down with much work, what with my finals and all that. oh by the by i just turned twenty five.. i know it is interesting to know that while at this age my closest friends would have worked for two years, i on the other hand with the way i am going don't intended to do much work till i am at least 26, at the earliest that is....

people often ask me if my male pride is not hurt? at which point i try to look for it and realize i misplaced it somewhere as usual, curse my self for drinking too much the previous night and sing fee fi fo fum to the tune of the latest Beyonce number..

Ironically this is the twenty fifth entry on my blog

Moral of the story: Twenty five year olds lie. You can't loose male pride due to alcohol. It is a myth . studies conducted at the University of South Chegalpettai District prove no positve correlation between the two.

Why I love Orkut..........

1] It has an about me section where you can write what a great guy you are.
2]It has a testimonial section where other people can say what a great guy you are.
3]it has a fans section about how many people think what a great guy you are.
4]it has a photos section which you can use o show what a great looking guy you are. if not you could always play the i like my privacy card and either put a picture of a flower or one which was taken on a camera phone when they first came out.
5]Its strangely addictive even though it serves the same purpose as a mail id and has the same number of steps to get in touch with a person. Only difference being on Orkut every conversation is public which can then show every person on Orkut what a great guy you are!

A day At the mall

It is Spring break and while the rest of my university(read young undergrads fly away to coastal retreats, to indulge in many a drunken abandon). i decided or more importantly, my wallet decided with an iron fist, that we (my wallet and i) would not go any where.
Therefore like every loser in town who has nothing to do My friend Shriram and i (no i don't call my wallet that) went to the local mall.We were fortunate enough to come across the following objects sold at our mall.Mind you I live in a small town in Texas.
1) Mooda(yes the same old faithful stool that we have spent many a winter oiling our heads in the sun on )
2) Native American Arts and Crafts (Made in China)
3) Hemchampa Agarbatti

Hmm.. Interesting..... What are you gonna throw at me next god?? That Jesus was just a Sardar drying his hair???

people are crazy and times are strange.....

ok these are the kind of comments people have left in the past on this blog. And i thought i was erratic and strange!!!!

4:29 PM

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Strange things i have actually done!!

1] Acted in a television serial. ( i played the role of the lead actors brother's friend. As i would like to believe, vital to the central plot of this drama. which i last heard, became a murder mystery)

2]Auditioned for voice overs for discovery channels Hindi dubbing, about Hawaiian canoes.

3]Sat through Super hit Mukabala, the day they promised Micheal Jackson would come on it and instead VJ Nonie came on .

4] Got drunk with friends on a railway overbridge.

5] poked a cow's butt for a bet

6] learned tables upto 40

7] learned squares upto 40

8] Sat through a prayer with Mormon nuns while they asked me what religion i was and then ask me how Jesus fit into Hinduism????

9] Got drunk with my closest buddy and pissed in his neighbor's flowers and the decided to unite India and Pakistan.

Yeeehaw!!!

Hello all you jobless people who read this blog. i am back(no that is not my name). Recently returned from Home land and back n American dreamland for gruelling semester i feel compelled to write briefly about my trip back and A certain Saras Chechi Who happens to be a little mischievous aunt of mine who walks around with a pin to deflate your ego and an evil smile( entirely for herself). also till i figure out a way to put a link on my blog here it is. Those of you who have taste in good writing..

www.sarasmeandersat.blogspot.com

My Brother and i went to a barber shop to get him a haircut and i have told you in earlier posts how i am a Chakka magnet. i have nothing against them (also mentioned earlier).
this is almost the end of my trip home an i am wondering how not one has found me as yet. And lo and behold(i have always wanted o say that... its funny how such phrases don't enter every day conversations) there they were at the door of the shop.
One of them instantly asked me for money and i told him i had none, when out of nowhere this other guy says 'Usse chhod do woh student hai'(all you filthy minded bums he meant leave him alone...).
'Woh student hai'??? i mean what is it with my face and student hai.

Is there a minimum facial hair requirement to be looked at as non student.

As the extortionist of the group went to the owner for money my so called Saviour came to me and introduced himself as Badramma and shook hands with me. Rather polite chap.

Moral of the story: There is no moral this was merely a Luke warm anecdote